The pregnancy

‘We genuinely thought, he’s just small. People have small babies’

Realising something was wrong

‘It’s not going to work out, basically’

Being told your baby has died

‘That sort of gives you a glimmer of hope’

The time before giving birth

‘No one tells you what you need for a dead baby’

The birth

‘My mum was there which was very helpful ’

Spending time with your baby

‘We felt calmer just to have him in the cot next to us’

Being back at home

‘I wanted my husband to be with me all the time.’

Deciding about a postmortem

‘I didn't want him to find a fault in her’

The funeral

‘It was hard making all these decisions’

Relating to family and friends

‘People were telling me to move on and have another baby’


‘You feel quite lonely’

Remembering your baby

‘Couldn’t imagine that she was down there’

Pregnancy after loss

‘It really tainted any idea I had of a normal pregnancy’

Insights and advice

‘Keep an account’