The pregnancy

‘Maybe I should have stayed in’

Realising something was wrong

‘I think I knew that he’d probably died’

Being told your baby has died

‘I just thought there's just something wrong with the equipment’

The time before giving birth

‘We would need to wait until the baby was ready to be born’

The birth

‘My mum was there which was very helpful ’

Spending time with your baby

‘I didn't let Jannah be on her own at any moment’

Being back at home

‘I had to face everything, pack everything away’

Deciding about a postmortem

‘Every post-mortem is research’

The funeral

‘I got the courage to hold her’

Relating to family and friends

‘It started bringing things up for everyone ’


‘To speak to people going through the same thing helped me tremendously’

Remembering your baby

‘It was a part of putting it behind us’

Pregnancy after loss

‘I suppose I relaxed a little bit more’

Insights and advice

‘I just talked and someone listened to me‘

First experiences

‘I didn’t get a chance to process my feelings until I was off call’

Facilities available to families

‘I don't hesitate to give them an extra appointment’

Clinical care

‘Clinically the tasks can be done with no emotion’


‘The training that we get is not particularly helpful’

Talking to and supporting families

‘It’s such a deep grief’

Support for clinicians

‘We do talk about it’

Partners and extended family

‘Men are not given space to grieve’

Post-mortems/further investigations

‘It must be done early because after that a woman closes down’

Showing emotion

‘You have to compartmentalise’

Insights and advice

‘Look like you’ve actually taken an interest in what's happened before’

Subsequent pregnancies

‘I like my ladies to wait’

Attitudes towards stillbirth

‘You worry about scaring people by talking about it’