The pregnancy

‘Baby was measuring really small’

Realising something was wrong

‘The baby is showing to be smaller than we’d expect at 20 weeks’

Being told your baby has died

‘They said that I'd have to deliver the baby’

The time before giving birth

‘For a few hours we actually forgot what was happening to us’

The birth

‘I had a glance of his back view and then he was gone’

Spending time with your baby

‘The pictures I got from the hospital were absolutely lovely’

Being back at home

‘I wanted my husband to be with me all the time.’

Deciding about a postmortem

‘We agreed for something called a visual post-mortem’

The funeral

‘It was hard making all these decisions’

Relating to family and friends

‘I found out who my true friends were and weren’t’


‘Let's start looking towards the future’

Remembering your baby

‘I remember moments and things while I was pregnant’

Pregnancy after loss

‘It was two years before I was brave enough to think about it again’

Insights and advice

‘I just talked and someone listened to me‘

First experiences

‘We all cried in the room’

Facilities available to families

‘It’s very important to get the level of memory making right for parents’

Clinical care

‘I would always encourage a normal delivery’


‘I’d be doing something in Scarlett’s name’

Talking to and supporting families

‘In a room with a woman in labour you can run out of things to say’

Support for clinicians

‘It's not a judgemental environment’

Partners and extended family

‘Sometimes they feel they’ve failed too’

Post-mortems/further investigations

‘They are working on doing MRIs on babies so they don’t have to cut them’

Showing emotion

‘They don’t need me to be dabbing tears away’

Insights and advice

‘I learn from every patient’

Subsequent pregnancies

‘When’s the right time and not the right time’

Attitudes towards stillbirth

‘We often times getting it wrong’