The pregnancy

‘The baby wasn’t as active as Claire had been’

Realising something was wrong

‘I think I knew that he’d probably died’

Being told your baby has died

‘Nothing was said’

The time before giving birth

‘How do we tell someone over the phone like that?’

The birth

‘Adrenaline pumping through my system is all I remember’

Spending time with your baby

‘It should just be the three of us’

Being back at home

‘You feel inferior’

Deciding about a postmortem

‘We felt that a post-mortem would help us’

The funeral

‘I didn’t want anyone else touching him bar me’

Relating to family and friends

‘I just physically couldn’t even speak to get the words out to tell people’


‘I probably had about 10 or 12 sessions’

Remembering your baby

‘Just felt like the right thing for us to do’

Pregnancy after loss

‘This one being small feels like the first time all over again’

Insights and advice

‘It shouldn’t be brushed under the carpet’

First experiences

‘I didn’t get a chance to process my feelings until I was off call’

Facilities available to families

‘We cut a little locket of their hair’

Clinical care

‘We don’t always get it right’


‘I’d be doing something in Scarlett’s name’

Talking to and supporting families

‘The hardest part is the first conversation’

Support for clinicians

‘We do talk about it’

Partners and extended family

‘I do think we tend to forget the dads’

Post-mortems/further investigations

‘Sometimes women go I don’t want him touched’

Showing emotion

‘It’s different if it’s someone you’ve formed a relationship with’

Insights and advice

‘I learn from every patient’

Subsequent pregnancies

‘You know that will be a long nine months’

Attitudes towards stillbirth

‘You worry about scaring people by talking about it’