Themes
The pregnancy
‘Maybe I should have stayed in’
Realising something was wrong
‘She was still kicking even the day before she was born’
Being told your baby has died
‘You knew it wasn't fine at that point?’
The time before giving birth
‘I wanted to disappear’
The birth
‘It was a mixture of so much love and pride’
Spending time with your baby
‘It should just be the three of us’
Being back at home
‘I had to face everything, pack everything away’
Deciding about a postmortem
‘Every post-mortem is research’
The funeral
‘The toughest part was going to pick up his ashes’
Relating to family and friends
‘People were telling me to move on and have another baby’
Grieving
‘Me and Shazia have always worked as a team’
Remembering your baby
‘It was a part of putting it behind us’
Pregnancy after loss
‘Once I was pregnant that's when the worry started’
Insights and advice
‘I made sure my missus was fine’
First experiences
‘I’d like to look after a woman in labour having a stillbirth’
Facilities available to families
‘I don't hesitate to give them an extra appointment’
Clinical care
‘We need to listen to women more’
Training
‘I don’t think we were taught to manage women who suffered it’
Talking to and supporting families
‘The word ‘concern’ is a word that really resonates with people’
Support for clinicians
‘People need support and debriefing’
Partners and extended family
‘Men are not given space to grieve’
Post-mortems/further investigations
‘We are happy with whatever level of investigation a parent wants’
Showing emotion
‘It’s different if it’s someone you’ve formed a relationship with’
Insights and advice
‘It's an important step in the grief process’
Subsequent pregnancies
‘Studies are based on averages and people are not averages’
Attitudes towards stillbirth
‘Are they struggling emotionally to deal with the pregnancy?’